Doing Hard Things & a Little Bit of PPA Vegas

I get asked all the time about the tattoo on my leg. The most common guesses I get are that it’s a “tear” or a “Christmas tree”. Can’t say I love getting asked if it’s a tear, as I believe in some gangs that’s the signal you’ve killed someone, but oh well. Should’ve gone bigger if I didn’t want that confusion😂.

My tattoo is something really near and dear to my heart and something I am really proud of. If you follow me on Instagram, I hope you saw the last reel I posted. My tattoo is the symbol of the Pacific Crest Trail, a 2652-mile trail that goes from the Mexican border to the Canadian border through the states of California, Oregon, and Washington. After I graduated college, I was crazy enough to take on this adventure, ALONE, and I’m so glad I did. If you want to see more footage from this adventure, check out this YouTube video my friends made. We all have the same tattoo now (:

We all had the same start date, and these three people have become some of the people I am most thankful for in my life. So, why did I decide to do this? There were a few reasons, but the main one was that I wanted to do something really, really difficult. I felt like I had lived most of my life on “easy” mode. Yes, my life had had its challenges, and by no means did I grow up with a silver spoon in my mouth, but what a luxury it is when the toughest decision you’ve had to make in your life is where you will get a full-ride scholarship to play D1 tennis.

I became fascinated with the concept of seeking out challenges during COVID after reading David Goggins’ book. The world of self-inflicted pain (ultra marathons and other endurance sports mostly) and the subsequent growth they result in was so fascinating to me. I went on a few backpacking trips and trained and ran a 50k trail race during this period before committing to the PCT as my big goal.

When people ask me about my experiences on the trail, I never really know what to say. Yes, it was beautiful. Yes, it was amazing. But also yes, it was really freaking hard and yes there were days I wanted to quit and yes I often felt I could scream at the sight of another mountain in the distance and yes there were times I wanted nothing more than to curl up in a ball and cry. I definitely love hiking, but not even close to as much as a lot of the psychos I met out there. I wanted to inflict pain upon myself and find a better version of myself on the other side of it. And, I can confidently say, I did.

I have too much to say about this experience for a newsletter post, but a lot of people DM’d me questions and I wanted to answer some of the most common ones.

How long did it take?
I was on the PCT for 113 days and hiked all but 178 miles in Northern California that were closed due to fires. I will go back and finish that section one day with my friends once the area has had some time to recover.

What is the furthest you hiked?
The answer to this question is actually very funny, and honestly, psychotic. So, a lot of people do a “24-hour challenge” in Oregon. It’s quite self-explanatory, you see how far you can go in 24 hours. How far did I go? 73.4 miles with 9000 feet of elevation gain and 9000 feet of descent with a full pack. Yeah, I’m probably the craziest person you know. I wrote in a journal every night (which I’m SO thankful I did), and here is a screenshot of my entry from the night before the challenge.

So yeah, I’ve always been competitive. I went the farthest out of everyone in my group. Losing in general I’m not a fan of, but losing to a MAN?! Nah. Sorry Jrt and Tom<3

What was your trail name?
Toad. I don’t want to talk about it.

What was the biggest thing you learned?
1. Bad days don’t have to stay bad days
2. We can do hard things

I know a crazy adventure like this isn’t reasonable for a lot of people due to the time commitment, but even though I’m only 26 I would really advocate for seeking out things that scare you or that others would deem crazy. I think the Grand Canyon Rim to Rim (or Rim to Rim to Rim, which is what I did) is a great, challenging adventure that is quite doable logistically. I am going through some personal things right now (nothing serious, I am fine, and I love you guys so much for caring about me so deeply❤️), but being someone who I like, love, trust, and am proud of is such a comfort when other things in your life are a bit confusing. I don’t think my sense of self-esteem would be what it is if I hadn’t put myself in tough situations and seen myself come out of them. So do the marathon, do the crazy hike, do the things that scare you. And you’re not too old for it!

I owe you guys a little bit of pickleball coverage, it is a pickleball newsletter after all😉! I feel the results have generally been quite chalk so far, but tomorrow there are several matches I’m quite excited for across every division. Honestly, I think the most interesting thing I’ve seen so far this week is Ben Johns staying back in singles.

I don’t think he’s doing this because it was the optimal strategy against his opponents so far this week, but rather to work on his groundstrokes and passing shots so he can do better against some of the newer ball strikers who pass so well off both wings (Hunter, Chris, Connor, etc). One thing about Ben is he is always going to be trying to learn/evolve. I will be very curious how his baseline game develops if he sticks with it. He’ll never be as good as the guys I mentioned from a pure baseline ball-striking perspective, but they will also never be as good as him at a multitude of skills. Ben improving in this area could help him a lot against this new style of singles player.

The other big shoutout I have to give is to Steve Deakin and Lindsey Newman! It’s an upset that probably won’t get the coverage it deserves, but their beating Matt Wright and Lucy Kovolava is an incredible win, especially considering Steve stacked exclusively on the right! Left side Lindsey holding it down while her and Steve showed that being a disciplined ball maker never goes out of style. They lost today to Federico and Alix, but still a super impressive win that deserves recognition.

Make sure to tune into PickleballTV all day tomorrow, we have lots of juicy matches, and it’s only the Round of 16! The ones I am most looking forward to, besides my own, are Max/Jaume v Riley/Noe, Rachel/Andrei v Jackie/Dekel, and Tyra/Christian v Mari/CJ. I will see everyone on the courts tomorrow! XO, Toad🐸😂